Christinas4’s Weblog

{May 12, 2010}   OH COME ON NOW, MILEY

Where are the parentals?


Giving your gay director a dirty lap dance is just not right. There’s plenty of time to give lap dances to men. And there is really no need to simulate lap dances on a chair. You have your whole life ahead of you to be a hussy. You kind of look constipated so maybe I’m reading too much into it and you just need some special yogurt. If that’s the case then please accept my apologies and let me reccommend some metamucil.

Regardless, this picture is forever and you’ll have to explain it till you die. That’s the thing with this crazy interwebs. You can never take any of it back . I for one am grateful we didn’t have all this cool technology back in my day or I would be living in a cave. But I was at least of legal age.

Let’s all quit this shit. I’m tired of sex tapes and sexy time pictures. Pleeeeeease! It was ok a few years ago but now everyone has a video or nekkid pictures. It’s boring and since you are young it’s creeping me out.


{January 6, 2010}   This Month’s People

Kate thinks we don’t know

The New Mullet

Those are the saddest extensions I’ve ever seen and they didn’t use enough. It pretty much looks like the new and improved mullet, not sexy. She should have consulted with extension Dr. Ken Paves but it looks like she went down to Sally’s and got her some of those Paris extensions.Even the, Real Houswives Or Orange County are laughing at those.

I do enjoy the picture for the secrets of, The Jersey Shore, pic. What’s the secret other than lots of hair gel and spray tan?

And poor, Elina, she looks like she wants to kill someone and she probably does. I’m sure I’ll read it.

{January 6, 2010}   The Daily Bale


The Bale that started it all

{January 6, 2010}   Marilyn Manson, Evan Rachel Wood

The wedding you never wanted to see happen.

I’m sure this will work out? Supposedly the tantrum prone singer and Dita clone are engaged. I have a feeling they are not going to register at, Crate and Barrel. They previously broke up and his response was,

Someone said to me, “Okay, I want to be with you until I die.” And then they gave up. I was at the point in my life where I was like, “Okay, let’s die, but I tell you what, I’m going to kill you first, because I don’t trust you.”

My lowest point was Christmas Day 2008, because I didn’t speak to my family. My walls were covered in scrawlings of the lyrics and cocaine bags nailed to the wall. And I did have an experience where I was struggling to deal with being alone and being forsaken and being betrayed by putting your trust in one person, and making the mistake of that being the wrong person. And that’s a mistake that everyone can relate to. I made the mistake of trying to, desperately, grasp on and save that and own it. And every time I called her that day — I called 158 times — I took a razorblade and I cut myself on my face or on my hands.

Yeah, so he sounds totally stable. Why wouldn’t you want to marry that guy? I wonder if the groom will wear black lipstick?

{October 8, 2007}   Crock of Love


Come on, that was the worst fake break up ever. Where was the drama ala, New York? It was just boring. Jess was all, You should be with Heather. And they just left you hanging.

He even tells Heater, before Jess comes up, he would like to continue their friendship as well as a sexual relationship. Well, he is a rock dude. They don’t have the best reputation when it comes to monogomy. Jess was just bored. It looked like she couldn’t wait to get out of there. She was only on for 4 minutes.

Lacey had more camera time than, Jess. Speaking of Lacey. She played us the most beautiful song ever, along with her band. It was a touching song titled, Shallow. Oh, and the dancing, The best interpretive dancing I’ve ever seen. I haven’t seen that kind of crawling on the floor since Madonna at the first ever, MTV Awards.

The sounds that came out of her mouth were similar to a cat in heat. So sexy and not at all like her usual manipulative, calculating, self. She must have slept with Rikki Rachman (however you spell it) to get on that stage.

Where has that guy been? I did notice they still have Headbanger’s Ball, on one of the MTV’s. There are like 5 of those now. How many of them play music? Gahhhhhhhh, someone play some music videos.

Overall it was snoooooring. There weren’t really any good confrontations. They really need to work on the drama. Please watch, Flava of Love, to see how it’s done right. I also recorded, The Smartest Model in America. I have yet to watch this sexy show. I need to make sure I watch it on an empty stomach or I may feel too fat to watch.

PS, how beautiful is Brets wig? Heather and Bret should be together. They can have hair braidng parties. Or maybe, hair teasing, parties. Either way, there is going to be a lot of hair products and lubes flying around.

{October 6, 2007}   Fine Frenzy


I found this artist a few weeks ago and she is amazing. Every song is absolutely amazing. I know awhile back everyone was talking about, Corinne Bailey Rae, who I love. But I really love this album more. Is it, album? I’m old, what are the kids calling it these days? MP3’s? Here is a link to her video.

{October 1, 2007}   Rock Of Love

heather.jpgTV is so evil. Desperate Housewives and Rock of Love, same night. Luckily I have the dvr so I taped those and rewatched, AMNT. The best part of that show was, Noted Photographer Nigel Barker.

Does anybody else ever forget they have their show taped and actually sits through a few commercial breaks? I was watching a commercial thinking how much I hated that one. I’m glad nobody was there to see my, duh moment.  D’oh, I just told the world. Damn me.

Heather is one hard biatch. She looks like she could knife someone. She practically let Bret die from insulin shock. TAKE THE BANDANA OFF, BRET. I loved Heather trying to defend her stripper dress by calling it a sundress.

I had a friend who was just like her. OMG, that hussy got us kicked out of the Denny’s. Anytime I’ve ever been in trouble where there were cops involved, that nut was there. She scared small children in lines by making evil faces at them. But she always had the best scoops on the parties. You can’t hate that girl. I like crazy Heather but I think she’s hiding an adams apple.

Brets got some really crazy Mili Vanili thing happening with his braids. And then these two head up to his room for, as  Heather puts it, sexy alone time. I need to hit the head after watching them kiss.

Heathers got to go back and rub it in Jess’ face. Jess’ is a bit stuck up but I like her too. I like them both. Off she goes in her “sundress”.  Heathers all nasty and talking about her, scent. It reminds me of that one scene in, Silence of the Lambs. You know.

So now Jess and Bret are off on a yact ride. But not before Heather lets Jess know that anytime Bret kisses her she’ll be tasting Heather. Ack, I bet she tastes like ashtray and testes.

Bret is getting too old for this crap. He practically dies on this date as well. Rest up grandpa. Poor guy, I feel bad for him. They have some tender moments. Jab that shot in his ass, Jess. And now they hit the jacuzzi and we see some pixilated ass. Hot tubs really gross me out. They are just a sexcesspool of dna and amoeba’s. Ewwww.

And now we get treated to some original Bret Michaels tuneage. I think it’s original, I’m not familiar with his beautiful catalogue of music. He bids Big John farewell to get on his rock bling and make a choice. Oh, and get on his bandana. WHAT’S UNDER THERE?

Heather is rocking some pretty sweet rock girlfriend hair. How can he say no to that hair? I bet he’s jealous of her hair. I reminds me of something, oh yes, wash, gel, dry, scrunch, spray, scrunch. In my heart I think he’s going for Heather and her porn hair.

Do you think he has sex with that bandana on? It’s like Who shot Jr? What’s under the bandana? He chooses Jess for almost plunging the needle in his ass. But not before he asks them both to be his rock girlfriends. Heather is down with the OPP. Jess stands strong, I hear you sistah she’s fun but she’s got the cooties.

But, OMG, she has the greatest exit, EVER. Watch your backs, she’s going to boil some bunnies. She will not be ignored. LOVE HER. More kissing. How long till they break up? Now Heather has to live with that, Bret, tatoo. ahahahahahah, hilarious. She should change it to, Britney.

{September 29, 2007}   Shootin the shit

george.jpgI’m sitting watching yet another tv show premiere. Las Vegas, nothing else is on. I overall am a little dissapointed in the premiere’s thus far. I know I shouldn’t expect much since they are setting up the upcoming storylines.

I wasn’t to excited how the cliffhangers were solved. Hero’s is going to have to give me a better explanation on how my boyfriend and his brother didn’t incinerate after exploding. I know he’s got regenerating powers and all that jazz (fosse fingers), but what the hell happened?

I’m going to give it a few weeks and see what’s up. Over on Grey’s, snoooooooooooooooooooooooring. I’m done, Grey’s is dead to me now. That’s fine, it just means more time for the Office and extra space on my dvr recorder.

Ugly Betty, I liked it but wasn’t wow’ed. I’m sure they are sad and can’t sleep over this. I found Hilda’s scenes sad and I am not ashamed to say I almost shed a tear or two. Don’t judge me. I didn’t actually cry. I’m going to hang in there and see how the season unfolds

I loved that Amanda’s ass got chunky. She’s got what Britney Spears has..She still looks in the mirror and still see’s, skinny. I wonder how long she’ll keep the fat suit on?

I soooooooooooooo loved CSI, Miami and I’m a sucker for all the CSI’s. I just love Miami the most becuase I can’t stop doing my David Caruso imitation. How fun is that? You know you do it too.

I thought the CSI, NY was ok. I’m not sure I’ll watch that one too much and I’m so mad at myself for missing the original CSI. DANG IT, what happened?

I have this problem that I mean to set my dvr to record and then forget to do it and end up watching it on my laptop. It’s just not as awesome on the small screen.

AMNTM. FIERCE! I know a lot of people hate this show but I for one, LOOOVE IT. Most notebly for, noted fashion photoger, Nigel Barker. And what was with Miss J’s hair? Come on sexy, I expect better from you.

And when did Old Navy become high fashion? That must mean my close are coture, bitches. Anyways that’s about all I had a chance to watch this week. I’m going to try and hang with, Desperate Houswives for a bit longer. I’m almost out of there after last season. This is also the last chance for Lost to prove itself to me. Don’t make me hate you, Lost.

et cetera