Christinas4’s Weblog

{October 31, 2007}   HALLOWEEEENY!!!!!!!!


I love, love, love, Halloween. It’s not just the candy either. I also love the really bad movies. And the good one’s. Exorcist always comes on and I remember the time in Georgetown we walked down the stairs from exorcist and we were pretty wasted and ended up crawling near the end. That and I think I might have been crying near the end becuase it was so scary.

Good thing they are right next to a bar. My friend kept saying, don’t trip and fall or you’ll die. No wonder I was crying she’s so mean. She also would make faces at small children in checkout lines.  I watched her make a few kids cry. It’s fine. She got arrested for hitting a car and trying to outrun the cops. Good times. But she’s not the same friend that got us kicked out of Denny’s for being drunk and disorderly. Remind me to tell you that tale of fun and intrigue.

The stairs are still there and for people who are into fitness they are really good to run up. They are near, M street. Or at least around there. It’s been a really long time since I’ve seen them. If I ever get back there I’ll try running them. Back then my only exercise came from the occasional beer crawl.


{October 31, 2007}   Some fun pics of the big day

hospitalbed.jpg Before, a shot, weeee

, after.jpg After, ohhhh nice, morphine

Here are some fun pics of the day.  Even drugged up and woozy I like to entertain. These pics were right after the shot in my IV. And I’ll also post some after I finally woke up and realized I was on morphine. Good times.

{October 25, 2007}   Back in the saddle!


So the time has come to get back into the swing of things. Today is officially two weeks from my sugery. I was getting sliced open like a turkey this time two weeks ago. Fun stuff.

I’m feeling really good and have been walking for short periods 2 to 3 times per day. I’m starting to feel like a load of caca. I used to do 2 to 3 classes a day and now I’m walking for about 10 minutes a day. Snooooooring.

I’m cleared to walk so I hit the treadmill before I start outgrowing my pants. I’m at the point where I’m feeling much better but since I still can’t do a lot of things I used to, I’m eating when I don’t need to. And while I’m not in danger of falling off the cliff, I’m walking towards the edge.

It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I made it 2 1/2 miles and over 200 calories. Yay for me. Now I just have to remember not to shove food in my cakehole when I get bored. I’m still working on the first book on my reading list. I still have two weeks before I go back to work so I should get on that.

Tomorrow I will try dun dun duh……..some yoga. I still can’t twist becuase of my incision but I can still do some standing and seated poses. Let’s all hope I don’t pull, rip, or, loosen, something.

{October 17, 2007}   I’M ALIVE, I’M ALIVE!!!!!!

Of course. Dead men tell no tales. So it goes a little something like this. Drop all the little people off to school. Husbo drives me to the hospital and really, not much waiting. I was prepared to wait mucho time. OMG there was a tv but I had to use my fingers to change the channel. What is this, a third world country. NO REMOTE. I’m having surgery people. That was my line for most of the day.

You expect me to make breakfast, I’m having surgery. You just never get to use that too much in life so I thought I would milk it for all it’s worth. The doctor comes in and chats with me. The husband person was out in the hall taking a work call. I’m having surgery here, take a message. Gahhhhhhhhh, do I have to die here to get some attention?

We discuss and finally my life partner comes back. Next up is the anesthesiologist. I’m sure I spelled that wrong but it’s too late for me to google. I’m tired, I’ve had surgery so cut me some slack. Oh, nice.  I have a new phrase, I like it.

He puts something in my iv and it’s all puppies and rainbows. What’s happening people, hoooollllaaa. So I decided to do a before picture. And once I get my bluetooth working I’ll up it to my mac and then will have to transfer it to this laptop. This stupid laptop has no bluetooth and not enough memory to download it directly from my, Blackberry. LAZY! You’ve had no surgery, what’s your deal?

Anyways, I decided that the best time to take my farewell uterus pictures is when I’m all drugged up. That’s what it must be like for Coutney and Britney. I now feel like I’ve walked a mile in their shoes so I can mock freely.

They kick the husband out and I’m pretty sure he got back on the phone as soon as he left. He has a, Treo. I hold it against him. And pretty much after that it’s all blackness. weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. I’ll take a pee break here and continue my tale.

Noooo, wait, I do remember being wheeled in to the surgery room and them telling me I had to shimmy to the operating table. WTF. I do remember my last words. “Wow, that table is pretty thin, what if my big butt falls off?” Fade to black. I’m pretty sure I was strapped in.

I wake up and the husband is not on a call but watching tv. awww no phone call, That’s true love people. I don’t remember much of our conversation but I did ask if this was my permanent room. Let me tell you, I had some bad gas. What’s with that. Did I mention the two enema’s I had to do before surgery? Surgery isn’t pretty. I’m just breaking it down for you.

I noticed an itch in the nether regions. I was completely bald. It was a drive by shaving and I was not prepared for it. I’m glad I was unconcious for that business. That’s a sucky job. Now I have to maintain that. Thanks a lot for that.  I’m going to get lazy and it will get itchy. Oh well.

I was on the demerol and was pretty itchy. I had one of those buttons to push. I was pushing every hour on the hour and sometimes twice. Did you know that drugs constipate you? It’s true. Constipated and gassy.

So I made it and as soon as I get my sexy before and after pictures, I will post. Oh yes, I got the after too. I have no shame. Weeeeeeeeeeee, I’m alive and free a uterus, ovary, and, tube.

The only thing is now I have no excuse for the pms and chocolate cravings. What else can I blame eating a tube of cookie dough on?

{October 10, 2007}   Favorite Past thing 93/94



PS, check out this site for some amazing free pictures. Don’t be a dork and forget to link them.


I completely forgot I was even doing this. I thought of all the thing from my past I loved so much. While listening to my Sansa, of course. I’m not ipod girl. I’ve have a few ipod tragedies so I switched to the Sansa mp3, 2 gig. I’m digressing here. I love this thing. It has radio, voice recording, video, music, and it cleans the dishes. All for less than an ipod. I use it with my yahoo music. I have the unlimited deal so I stock that sucker up with music for when I run or I hook it up to my stereo and listen to when I do my yoga.


No Yanni or Enya when I do my yoga’s. Lame inside joke alert. I like some Marley, Zepplin, Floyd, rap, hip hop. Whatever, I just like funky music when I flow. Since I will not be doing anything for awhile I did some today. One of the songs was, Mazzy Star, Fade Into You. That song is so fetch. I saw mean girls and it’s stuck in my head.


Anywhooooooooooo. It took me back to the days of listening to the Cranberries and dating this college guy who was kind of a wuss.There was some good music around at that time. Cowboy Junkie’s and the movie I remember most, The Crow. How hot was Brandon Lee, very. Coffee houses were still pretty trendy and unheard of. You could get a cup of latte as big as your head for less than you’d pay today. And you could hear various conversations on poetry, anarchy, alternative this, alternative that. Also, whoomp there it is and knockin da boots, was pretty big.


I miss some of the fun stuff but glad to be over those fashions. There was a lot of lip lining and catsuits were a hit. Oy.Here’s a clip of , Fade Into You.  It’s from you tube and it’s a mix of some old footage from Fred Astaire and Rita Hayworth dancing. Beautiful and enjoy.

{October 10, 2007}   FAREWELL CRUEL WORLD!


I’m just being over dramatical. Tomorrow is the big day and my noggin is swirling with many emotions. Fear, anxious, nervous, overwhelmed, relief, etc. It’s what I call my, Coalition of Emotions.

The fun stuff. I have to do an enema tonight and one early morning. Yikes, so not looking forward to that. I have no idea how long till I’m able to log on but knowing me it won’t be too long.

I will have much time in my day to blog about nothing in particular. Maybe even a few, pain pill, induced writings. How fun will that be. Sooooooo, this is it people. Well, not really for anoter 16 hours. Soon enough, soon enough. I bid you a fond farewell and leave you this portrait of me trying to rock the side ponytail.

I hate when I take a yoga class and the pony tail stabs you in the head. I’m trying it on the side these days. My final words I got off a bathroom wall.

For a good time call, just kidding.

Do something once a day that scares you.  I totally got that fron a store I shop at way too much. But try it anyways. I’ll see you nutjobs on the flips side. Plus, I may make a ANTM post before I check in for the night.

PS, I remodeled my kitchen and it is not longer that horrid blue. I was in some weird country phase. I’ve been cured of that.

{October 10, 2007}   What’s wrong Tv?


I’m going with this Burger King picture becuase I find it so disturbing.

Overall the new tv season is, meh. I’m not overly impressed with you, tv. There are a couple of shows that I like, Pushing Daisies, Dirty Sexy Money, Carpool. But overall I’m still more interested in my old favorites.

The Office, Earl, Heroes, Ugly Betty, ANTM, The Daily Show. I was worried about, Betty. Luckily the story has picked back up and I’m interested again.

On Heroes I’m happy to see my boyfriend Milo Vilmontoyamontalban, I can never spell his name, is still alive and hot. I like that Claire has a flying boyfriend. Who didn’t have that fantasy in high school, Maybe just me then. Plus I also love the twish with Hiro falling in love and conflicted. What to do? Give up love and keep history intact or, pursue his love and possibly screw with the world? What will he do?

And I am always happy to see Steven employed. I know he is no long on Dynasty but I don’t care, He’s always Steven Carrington to me. The other Steven doesn’t exist to me. He is the lesser Steven Carrington, Live with it faux Steven.

Tonight is my favorite of alllllllllll, ANTM, episodes. The much ballyhooed (shout out to my hag, BBB) makeover show. How awesome is that. The least like is going to get the, Mia Farrow. hahahaha. Cry models, cry. Your hair may look crappe (my french pronunciation of crappy) but don’t ever lose the fierce. That’s, FIERCE!, exclamation point intended.

What I’m really anxious for is the return of, Lost. It’s the make or break season for us. I was almost out last year but they sucked me back in near the end. I love the bittersweet ending of going back and forth in time like that. You think being rescued would be the greatest thing ever but in fact it might be the undoing of some of the castaways. Wait, is castaway just for the shipwrecked ala Gilligan or could it also apply to plane crashes?

Either way, I’m excited to see what happens. Don’t toy with my emotions writers of Lost. I swear I will flip the channel and never flip back. I’m not even joking. ER and Grey’s are totally dead to me. Is ER still on? Damn, put that show out of it’s misery all ready.

I have a feeling many of the new shows will not be around in the next 3 weeks. See you later, Caveman, we hardly knew ye. But bonus, Rock of Love 2 is in the works. I guess Bret and Heather aren’t going to make a go of it. Shame, that hair was built to last.

{October 8, 2007}   Crock of Love


Come on, that was the worst fake break up ever. Where was the drama ala, New York? It was just boring. Jess was all, You should be with Heather. And they just left you hanging.

He even tells Heater, before Jess comes up, he would like to continue their friendship as well as a sexual relationship. Well, he is a rock dude. They don’t have the best reputation when it comes to monogomy. Jess was just bored. It looked like she couldn’t wait to get out of there. She was only on for 4 minutes.

Lacey had more camera time than, Jess. Speaking of Lacey. She played us the most beautiful song ever, along with her band. It was a touching song titled, Shallow. Oh, and the dancing, The best interpretive dancing I’ve ever seen. I haven’t seen that kind of crawling on the floor since Madonna at the first ever, MTV Awards.

The sounds that came out of her mouth were similar to a cat in heat. So sexy and not at all like her usual manipulative, calculating, self. She must have slept with Rikki Rachman (however you spell it) to get on that stage.

Where has that guy been? I did notice they still have Headbanger’s Ball, on one of the MTV’s. There are like 5 of those now. How many of them play music? Gahhhhhhhh, someone play some music videos.

Overall it was snoooooring. There weren’t really any good confrontations. They really need to work on the drama. Please watch, Flava of Love, to see how it’s done right. I also recorded, The Smartest Model in America. I have yet to watch this sexy show. I need to make sure I watch it on an empty stomach or I may feel too fat to watch.

PS, how beautiful is Brets wig? Heather and Bret should be together. They can have hair braidng parties. Or maybe, hair teasing, parties. Either way, there is going to be a lot of hair products and lubes flying around.

{October 6, 2007}   Getting ready to teach

I have this whole mental thing I do where I try to visualize my class and hopefully when I get up in front of everyone, I make it happen. Sizzle, sparkle, pizazz. I’m not sure I bring the pizazz every week but I’m pretty sure I always sparkle. I try. With the kids being sick this week I’m overtired and not sleeping very much. I’m not sure I can bring any of the above things. I may just be bringing, snap, crackle, and, pop.

Of course the day I need extra help I am out of my, Rockstar. Diet, of course. Wait, if I get off my behind this very second, I could get some. People, you just witnessed a light bulb moment. That’s what Oprah calls them. I do not question the greatness that is, Oprah. I feel a little bit of sizzle happening. I just need my theme song for the week. Gimmie more! Let’s go, Britney, it’s time to shine.

{October 6, 2007}   Fine Frenzy


I found this artist a few weeks ago and she is amazing. Every song is absolutely amazing. I know awhile back everyone was talking about, Corinne Bailey Rae, who I love. But I really love this album more. Is it, album? I’m old, what are the kids calling it these days? MP3’s? Here is a link to her video.

{October 6, 2007}   A pox upon your family


Sweet fancy moses, my kids have the chicken pox. WTF? I vacinated their germy little bodies. Apparently you can still get it but it’s not as severe. I remember back in the stone age when I had it all over my body and in some of my nether regions. Not pretty.

Actually only 3 out of 4, have it. To top it off, they will be home most of next week, My surgery is next week. Oh help me, Jesus. How restful 3 screaming kids will be. Help me out hydrocodone. I don’t know if that will be enough. I may need to call on his friend, oxycotin. Maybe just a nice swing to the head with a bat. Just make sure I’m unconcious.

They all look fine other than a few red splotches. That is good to note. However if any of them infect me, it’s farging war. I am not cancelling this surgery. I’ve mentally prepared myself for it and I am ready to go. Put me on the table and cut me open aleady.

And tell me how much you love my chicken picture. He’s completely naked and hilarious. What happened to his feathers? Was he robbed? I don’t know but I LOVE IT. You are one hot chicken. Yes, I know it’s a rooster but there were no pictures of any chickens this lovely. Papa don’t preach, I’m keeping my rooster.

{October 3, 2007}   Freezy Freaky’s


I loved mine and I wish I had a pair. Not that it would matter since it’s October here and nearly 100 outside. It’s so weird buying Halloween decorations and wearing shorts. That’s an exaggeration, I never wear shorts. I stopped wearing them when I hit 28, true story. I’m mostly in my yoga clothes. I digress.

I grew up around sleet and snow so I would run out, stick them in the snow and then, warm them up. It was a whole routine. This is my favorite nostalgic product of the week. I’m just full of them. But this week I pay homnmage to my old friend, Freezy Freaky’s. Wherever have you gone old mittens? Probably to the same place all my friendship beads and leg warmers went.

{October 3, 2007}   Fish hate us


 I saw this story on CNN, it made me chortle for some reason. I like to imagine they’re hanging out on the bottom of the lake planning their revenge.

Fred, you dare me to go up there and smack that stupid human in the head?

Do it Fred, DOOOOO IT!

ORLANDO, Fla., July. 29 (UPI) — Wildlife officials are struggling with a record pace of incidents involving jumping huge sturgeons hitting people in Florida. During the past 24 months alone, more than 12 incidents involving the leaping fish and humans have occurred between the Suwannee River and Manatee Springs with some resulting in injuries, WKMG-TV of Orlando, Fla., said Saturday. Sturgeons, which have been around for about 195 million years, are known jumpers that can grow eight feet long and weigh as much as 200 pounds. But why they are smacking into humans recently has regional wildlife experts and boaters puzzled. One sturgeon’s tough skin even caused one local personal watercraft rider to get stitches on her knee after the fish suddenly leaped in front of her. The TV station reported that wildlife experts have said the fish typically spawn in the Suwannee River and then migrate to the Gulf of Mexico late in the year.

It’s all fun and game till you get smacked in the head by a fish. Not good times.

{October 2, 2007}   Blackberry Pearl


Check me out, people. I have a Blackberry, I’m like the Queen of England up n here. I feel like I’ve just joined the year 2005. Welcome and I’m glad to be here. First things first, I love it. It’s so sleek and cute and has the ability to turn on the letter keys.

You have no idea how awesome this is for me. Normally it takes me 10 minutes to write, I can’t type, call me on the phone. But nobody calls anybody these days. It’s all that fancy text messaging. Now I’ll be able to type the previous sentence in only 5 minutes.

I’m also not a fast typist which has nothing to do with the keys and but everything to do with my slowness. The problem is that, I don’t know how to do anything on this amazing new phone. I plugged it in and it prompltly told me there wasn’t enough power or some crap.

Regardless, I have a crackberry and can now text and use the internet. And someday I’m going to figure out which key I hit to make that magic happen. Baby steps people, baby steps.

Update, after 2 calls to customer service, I’m in business. I can do it all now. The world is all at my fingertips for the low price of 49.99 with my, Blackberry Bundle. Awesomeness.

Gimmie More, is my ringtone, bitches. I’m too excited to be properly ashamed. DON’T JUDGE ME! I don’t care, judge me. But call me when you do it so I can listen to my new ringtone.

I’ve had the same one for a year with my old phone. I got some crappy unlocked on off of, Ebay. It was from another country and I couldn’t ever change the time or date on it. Plus I had to use a special adapter to charge it. Wath those Ebay phones people. Hooollla.

{October 1, 2007}   10 days, not like I’m counting


In 10 days I will be getting sliced open like a Thanksgiving Turkey. Actually, I will hopefully avoid that but after 2 c-sections it may be unavoidable. I just won’t know till I wake up. It will be like a surprise party minus the party part. I think I will have a party though later in my room with whatever narcotic they give me for the pain.

I’m starting to get a little anxious becuase although I know I will feel relief and drastically decreased my chances for uterine cancer, the unknown is a scary thing. I’m trying not to let the what if’s occupy my mind and if they start coming up I try not to let them take over. Positive thoughts people. It happens occasionally. 

A super nice student was telling me it took her almost 6 months to get her practice back. Kill me now. Positive, positive, breathe. I’m trying to make a mental list of all the great things I can do afterwards.

For instance, walking down the hallway and then back again to my bed. I kid. All the new show seasons will have started to I’m set there. I have a new Jefferey Deaver book, well, it’s new to me. I plan to also reread, The Peaceful Warrior. Check that book out, it’s life changing. I should write Oprah about it. Or have my own book club. At the moment that would just be me and if any other lost soul finds this, then you too. Hoollla.

I haven’t crocheted in awhile and I have a pattern and yarn so I’m going to try that. I’m a little rusty and last time I tried to make a scarf it ended up looking more like a tube sock. I think I made my stitches too tight.

I’m really exhausted overall. I teach a class, do some errands, a little laundry and I’m wiped out the rest of the day. That is just no way to live. I think 70 year olds have more pep than me. I know my 3 year old is. Thankfully he is in part time pre-k and that tires him out pretty good. He’s quick. I wish I could get that in liquid form and make an energy drink. It would kick Red Bulls ass. Sugar free of course. I only drink the sugar free.

Not that the Red Bull does anything for me at the moment. I guess it helps me get through the laundry which is something. When your used to juggling 20 things at once it’s hard to slow down and admit you need to sit on the sidelines for a bit. I’m a firm believer in being part of the process and just by your own sheer will, you can make things happen. I consider this an extension of a yoga class where I can not force and have to accept and be at peace with what is. It won’t be so forever and any situation is temporary, si?

I just wonder if I could hire say, Jake Gyllenhal to be my temporary man servant? He seems like he’d be really helpful in that way. I bet his mama brought him up right. Wooooo, almost time for yoga class, I need to red bull it up and make it a double. I have a feeling I’m going to be dragging my ass across the finish line this week. Hoooolllaaa.

{October 1, 2007}   Rock Of Love

heather.jpgTV is so evil. Desperate Housewives and Rock of Love, same night. Luckily I have the dvr so I taped those and rewatched, AMNT. The best part of that show was, Noted Photographer Nigel Barker.

Does anybody else ever forget they have their show taped and actually sits through a few commercial breaks? I was watching a commercial thinking how much I hated that one. I’m glad nobody was there to see my, duh moment.  D’oh, I just told the world. Damn me.

Heather is one hard biatch. She looks like she could knife someone. She practically let Bret die from insulin shock. TAKE THE BANDANA OFF, BRET. I loved Heather trying to defend her stripper dress by calling it a sundress.

I had a friend who was just like her. OMG, that hussy got us kicked out of the Denny’s. Anytime I’ve ever been in trouble where there were cops involved, that nut was there. She scared small children in lines by making evil faces at them. But she always had the best scoops on the parties. You can’t hate that girl. I like crazy Heather but I think she’s hiding an adams apple.

Brets got some really crazy Mili Vanili thing happening with his braids. And then these two head up to his room for, as  Heather puts it, sexy alone time. I need to hit the head after watching them kiss.

Heathers got to go back and rub it in Jess’ face. Jess’ is a bit stuck up but I like her too. I like them both. Off she goes in her “sundress”.  Heathers all nasty and talking about her, scent. It reminds me of that one scene in, Silence of the Lambs. You know.

So now Jess and Bret are off on a yact ride. But not before Heather lets Jess know that anytime Bret kisses her she’ll be tasting Heather. Ack, I bet she tastes like ashtray and testes.

Bret is getting too old for this crap. He practically dies on this date as well. Rest up grandpa. Poor guy, I feel bad for him. They have some tender moments. Jab that shot in his ass, Jess. And now they hit the jacuzzi and we see some pixilated ass. Hot tubs really gross me out. They are just a sexcesspool of dna and amoeba’s. Ewwww.

And now we get treated to some original Bret Michaels tuneage. I think it’s original, I’m not familiar with his beautiful catalogue of music. He bids Big John farewell to get on his rock bling and make a choice. Oh, and get on his bandana. WHAT’S UNDER THERE?

Heather is rocking some pretty sweet rock girlfriend hair. How can he say no to that hair? I bet he’s jealous of her hair. I reminds me of something, oh yes, wash, gel, dry, scrunch, spray, scrunch. In my heart I think he’s going for Heather and her porn hair.

Do you think he has sex with that bandana on? It’s like Who shot Jr? What’s under the bandana? He chooses Jess for almost plunging the needle in his ass. But not before he asks them both to be his rock girlfriends. Heather is down with the OPP. Jess stands strong, I hear you sistah she’s fun but she’s got the cooties.

But, OMG, she has the greatest exit, EVER. Watch your backs, she’s going to boil some bunnies. She will not be ignored. LOVE HER. More kissing. How long till they break up? Now Heather has to live with that, Bret, tatoo. ahahahahahah, hilarious. She should change it to, Britney.

et cetera