Here is a picture of soup. And another recreating me calling her to beg for her recipe.

 

My grandmother has this habit of not sharing her recipes. It took me nearly a year to figure out her sofrito. Which tastes so yummy over rice with some carne. Ay yi yi. But I’m still trying to figure you her chicken soup. It’s more like a stew then a soup and has a whole chicken cut up, squash, no carrots or celery, and other stuff. But you also pour it over rice and it’s ddddddd lish. I think it’s something along the lines of Asopao de Pollo.

 But anytime I try to get it out of her she always gives me. “Ohh, quina, I put in a little of this and a little of that”. My grandparents always call me Quina. I have no idea what it means. 

Anywhoooooozzle, I’m finding similar recipes but not quite what I’m looking for. I’m sure there is a sofrito base in there as with many Puerto Rican recipes. There were probably some bouillan cubes as well. I’m telling you that not even the CIA could pry her recipes away from her. 

Let me tell you a little something about my grandmother. She was schooled at a convent and is super old school. She has a whistle she takes with her on walks in case she ever runs into, and I quote, “Dat man a cheee a wchaant to rchape me.” She’s Rican so she rolls the r’s a lot. And when she curses it’s hard to make out what she’s saying. Ju stooped house. I’ve decided that means you’re a stupid ass. And she likes the wine. So I’m going to say there was wine in that recipe. More in her glass than in the pot but it’s probably in there. 

I’ve been finding similar recipes and trying to change them up. Nothing is close. I just want some stinking Rican chicken stew so I can pour it over my rice and enjoy with some plantanos fritos. What’s a girl gotta do to get a recipe?

 

I’m now one of those people who talk about their pet. But look at that, it’s so cuuuuute. Nacho has taken himself a lady friend and the fact they are from two different worlds matters to him not. Sure she’s full of fluff and doesn’t return his affections. He still loves her, or him. I’m not sure yet but if he see’s her lying around he mounts her and tries to give her his man love. I’m not sure if she enjoys it or is just humoring him. 

I’m really proud that even though he’s small in stature and his girlfriend is much bigger than himself. He’s man enough to not let it bruise his ego. He’s still too small for being fixed but as soon as he’s old enough, snip snip. He already thinks our shoes are his foe and attacks at his leisure. I don’t also need him to try and make love to my feet. No way that guy could work a whole leg without falling off. He just can’t help it. He’s half chihuahua and his latin lover side just takes over.

There’s my Nachos Grande story for the day. Keep on humping Nacho.

 

 

I’ve aquired two new additions to the family. I’m working on getting the picture of one of them. She’s just too fast for my camera. Luckily the other one is too slow. Announcing Mr. Nachos Grande. He’s one full pound of love and friskiness. I saw an ad for him and couldn’t resist his cuteness. 

Originally his name was Mr. Justin Timberlake. But a few family members thought it was emasculating enough that he looked like a girl dog without humiliating him more. Gahhhh. So after more consideration we’ve named him Nachos Grande.

His favorite things are; Fighting with shoes, waking me up at 4 am, running around in circles till he falls, and my favorite, pretending to lick your face and then trying to eat it off. He’s the Hannibal Lechter of puppies. He’s small but he’s scrappy. 

Obviously it’s been a long time since last post and much has happened. Sadly, nothing exciting, hmpf. I sure I wish I had some exciting adventure to report but all I have is this lame post about my hair. 

So it’s getting hot and I decided I wanted to be blonder. Too bad my camera sucks the big one so the picture isn’t all that great. I have an addiction to hair color and bleach so I’m surprised I still have any hair left on my head. I started with a base color and then did blonde chunks wherever I felt like it. Probably not the method approved by Vidal Sasson. But that guy did not even bother to help me out. 

Looking at this picture makes me scared. I just realized that if I were on Americas Next Top Model, I would be the tranny one. Tyra would tell me to watch the angles of my face so I don’t look too hard. And to add insult to injury. She’d give me the Mia Farrow hair don’t. And I’m obviously emoting enough fierceness with my eyes. I’m such a dissapointment. Maybe I could still make it on Rock of Love? Brett Michaels seem to like the ladies who look like dudes.

 

 

I have a new phone since my other one is just not performing up to my standards. And yes, this is like my fourth this year. I’m hard to please so be aware, Blackjack 2. Don’t disappoint or you’ll be like the rest of my phones. I thought about getting a different Blackberry but found out you need to have a separate texting plan. Something about having their own server. I smell conspiracy. So that was a no to me. I will not be ripped off, damnit. I settled on Blackjack 2 even though I wanted an Iphone. But I was afraid since like most other Apple products, they don’t play well with other programs. I have a mac but every other computer in our home has Windows XP. Yes, I said other. Like 6 total.Don’t even ask. But if you ever feel like checking emails while you’re in your, “office”. We also have wireless. Just don’t tell me about it afterwards. Keep that information to yourself.It’s a pretty sexy phone and I have yet to figure it all out. It looks pretty dummy proof so far. But Samsung has not met this dummy yet and I’m sure I’ll get confused. Everything seems pretty easy to find and it’s so shiny and has a wheel. The pics are pretty good but it’s still a camera phone. 

 

Either way, here is a picture of Christian Bale. He has nothing to do with my phone but it makes me happy.